Sunday, March 31, 2013

The first blog of 2013. All the resolves to write regularly is well..but a sham! Been thinking of quite a few things to write, but then I don't because I don't make the time, or sometimes simply because I am scared of putting my thoughts in the open space...
what a hypocrite I am sometimes, while I know I could make this my complete online thought keeper and change the privacy settings for just me to view...I like the possibilities of this being read by others...sometimes by people who I would have contextually written with reference too....what childishness...sometimes I wonder if I will every grow up, mentally that is. Otherwise age is definitely creeping by!
Talking of age...come March, another year has gone by. This time too it was a working birthday. As usual nothing happened. The only positive aspect of it all, is though like all other years nothing happened,  this year I atleast shielded myself from the disappointments from expectations. Expectations that I set myself upto every year in that that wonky head of mine and feel miserable and let down, because nobody else much cared...people who always remember, remembered! Most of them did anyways!
Life's been trudging along. New venture again in 2013. Working with a friend from the yesteryears comes with it's own challenges and fun! Living through those. Where this will end - I know not for now. How I would like it to end - I have a fair idea. Will it end there - I again know not for now....and so like all the other  things in my life - will let life lead me on to where my journey leads.
Personally life continues to be as confusing as ever! Maybe I thrive on this confusion. Maybe I lead myself into this confusion. If this confusion does not exists, then probably I don't. I'm just not cut out for the "Normal" ways of life. Complication and confusion are the center Cs of it. So why cheat myself from those - right?'
Immediate agenda - make money, travel and think of growing old nicely and comfortably. Keep thinking I should put a propa plan of action in place to get to these goals.....but it still lies at the "to think" phase. Maybe will take the next step soon....maybe just maybe...soon very soon! A quarter of 2013 has zipped by....hopefully will make the remaining 3 quarters count in some way. After all 36 is a good number to be at...ain't it. 

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